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New Job Anxiety

anxious

* The above image is from Everyday Health.

Have you ever gotten anxious over starting a new job?

Feel free to share your stories here! I will start the ball rolling!

Here’s my story.

Being a partial hikikomori, I always get nervous whenever I have to go work at a new place.

My anxiety would usually clear up after getting paid for the first time.

This time, I received an offer to work at a 1-person assignment. I should be feeling less nervous since I won’t have to deal with colleagues or managers. But I still can’t help feeling nervous.

Because, this time, the stakes are high. I have to save up enough money for my book publishing effort plus enough to live for a while. Because waiting for the designer to finish with the cover design and the layout artist to complete her work and the printers to finally print and bind the book will take a while.

After that, I will have to hawk my book at public venues, because brick-and-mortar bookstores don’t carry self-published titles. That means I have to pay rent for my booth before getting paid.

Before all that, months before I get everything ready, I will probably have to spend hundreds on Facebook ads.

So yeah, I am feeling pretty nervous.

I also have to wonder what will become of my fitness by then. I have just started running 2.4 kilometer runs at the park. Slowly going back to my peak period in the army. Now, I have to take a long long break from exercising. I have already mentioned this in another blog post, but I will say it again here. It’s nearly impossible to find the time and energy to exercise properly when you have to work for 72 hours per week. Add in the traveling time and it comes to around 84 hours per week.

So I am nervous. And scared. Because how many more years can I throw away? I don’t have that many years left to attempt to master the martial arts anymore. If I grow fat and lethargic as a security guard, my dream of martial art mastery will be for naught!

At the age of 41, this security guard who’s attempting to become a writer AND a martial artist is feeling anxious about his future…

Loh Teck Yong

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I Got Into The Papers!

A reporter from the Lianhe Zaobao  interviewed me about my book and plans for the future. The article was printed on Thursday, the 9th of March. Here are photos of the newspaper clipping.

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A Summary Of The Article In English:

The article starts off with a quote from me. About how it has always been my dream to become a writer and as long as I haven’t fulfilled my dream, I will never give up.

Then it goes on to say that I quit being a full-time guard back in 2009, to focus on writing my manuscript. And through my stories, I hope to let more people understand the hardships in the security industry.

I graduated from secondary school with O levels, the article says. And in 1999, I started working as a security guard. Since then I have worked as a dishwasher, kitchen cleaner and sales assistant before returning to the security industry.

I loved reading English books ever since I was a kid. And the article quotes me as saying, “Security guards, while they are doing their job, frequently get abused by unreasonable people and for the sake of making a living, even if their working conditions are bad, they will choose to keep silent. I hope that after reading my book, the public would act a little more kindly towards security guards.”

However, things are not going well for me because I have been rejected by 4 publishers.

The publishers probably thought that stories about the security industry are unsaleable. That’s why none of them were willing to pick up my manuscript. But for the sake of realizing my dream and letting more people know about the lives of security guards, I will not give up.

So I will either raise the money to self-publish or continue to submit my manuscript to other publishers.

And finally, the article concludes with a quote from me.

“J.K. Rowling had her Harry Potter manuscript rejected 12 times, but she didn’t give up and went on to become a bestselling author. So as long as I don’t give up, there’s always hope.”

Okay, End of Translation.

P.S.: Bear in mind that the article was written by the reporter in the 3rd person, but I use the 1st person point of view for my translation because only royalty and cute Japanese girls use the 3rd person when talking about themselves.

Loh Teck Yong (罗德荣)

 

Portrait Of A Security Guard

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This portrait was drawn by my friend, Stephane Griswold. Amazing, isn’t it? We have never met before in Meat Space and just based on our conversations on Facebook, he imagined what I was like at work and produced this picture.